Getting Help

          

          There are many individuals whom suffer from domestic violence everyday. You as a reader may need help or are looking to help a friend in trouble. From experience a pushy approach will not help the situation and make someone feel comforted. I for one would not listen to people when they said I needed out or needed help and saw the controlling aspects of my marriage. The temper that was shown and the verbal abuse that some may have seen or did not see behind closed doors, raised eyebrows. However, I shut people out as they approached me. I would not listen. One may not feel comforted by this as I sure didn't. Although, I was always walking on eggshells with my partner and felt as though if I did not do as he wanted, things would escalate. I stayed in the relationship out of comfort and fear. 

"When people think of domestic abuse, they often picture battered women who have been physically assaulted. But not all abusive relationships involve violence. Just because you’re not battered and bruised doesn't mean you’re not being abused. Many men and women suffer from emotional abuse, which is no less destructive. Unfortunately, emotional abuse is often minimized or overlooked—even by the person being abused."(helpguide.org 2013)

I sure did not realize that this was abuse for many years. I subjected my son in this as well. While dealing with this it is difficult to get away as good loving gestures and apologies continue in the cycle of abuse. My situation was just as this. What many do not realize is that the verbal abuse becomes physical. When it came time for of me to leave and I had enough of my situation (which is something someone must realize on their own) things got violent. He attempted to attack me with his cane. 

Petition by iPetitions

Do's and Don'ts

Do:

• Ask if something is wrong
• Express concern
• Listen and validate
• Offer help
• Support his or her decisions

Don’t:

• Wait for him or her to come to you
• Judge or blame
• Pressure him or her
• Give advice
• Place conditions on your support

Adapted from: NYS Office for the Prevention of Domestic Violence

If you or anyone you know is being abused there is help for men and women 

Follow me on twitter @movingforward30

Tweets by @MovingForward30

This is a FREE site. However, if anything here has been helpful to you or someone you know, please consider making even a small donation.